All Night

Blogging at 5 in the AM let's see how this works out.

House number two underway. For those who haven't hear house number one didn't work out so much. House number two is a whole lot nicer and bigger so fingers crossed and prayers needed.

School starts in a week. I am running around like a chicken with my head cut off trying to finish everything because we have Orientation Tuesday. Year number two isn't near a nerve racking. I have very mixed emotions about this second year. I feel as if I can't have any cooler kids than I did last year and I am going to miss them. I am on the other hand excited to have a new set of students who will have another special place in my heart. I am trying, trying being the major word in this sentence, to get ahead start on being more organized. Let me tell you it's for the birds. Kris says I am going a little overboard but I just think he doesn't get it. I really want every kid that comes through my class to remember that year as the year they learned more and had more fun doing it than any other year before.

We have a new niece her name is Lorelia. I got to talk with her today. I am sure that she understood every word of the baby talk too :-). I really miss not being there and holding her. I had to hold back the tears because I was talking with them at work. EB is as cute as ever. It's just weird, like for me there has always been EB and she has been the wallpaper and back drop on my everything. She is also the one I go on and on about and people are giving me the shut up Jessi she's just your niece kind of look. And now she shares that spot with a little baby that is her sister. I just don't have a picture of them together so EB is back drop on everything but my phone. Phone goes to Lorelia.

I guess that is how my dad, sister, and brother felt. Haha! Man I wish I could really go to sleep. Lock in NEVER again!

I Don't Wanna Grow UP

So 210 N. Queens could be the house of our dreams (maybe).

Sometimes, well quite frankly most of the time I do not feel old enough to be buying a house. I do not feel old enough to be married, have a dog, take care of rent, have gown up job, and so on and so forth. But I guess that i am old enough I just do not feel like I should be.

The two things that make me feel the oldest...buying a house and the question on every single person I have talked to in the last six months children. When did I become old enough to even ask about those two things? When did I become mature enough to even think of those two thoughts? I look in the mirror and I can see the effects of aging already starting to take place. At the ripe old age of 21 ;-) the notion of living forever on this earth is hitting me harder than ever.

You know the AT&T commercial where the man sees the woman on the train and then they skip ahead to their future and their son is president...yeah that does not appeal to me. I feel like it should. To grow old with the man I love and to have children that I am proud of who will have child. To see my sister, cousins, and friends with their children makes me want one but to think of them growing up and me having to grow older yeah not so much into that. I am i having a mid-life crisis before my mid- life?

And then to top it off all of my friends are getting married or in serious relationships. We are having careers of our own, nurses, teacher, working for newspapers. When did our dreams become reality? What is going on? When did we all become old enough to be old enough?

I still re-late life situations to things on tv. Grown ups don't do that.