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About Me

Christ-follower, Wife, Mom, Daughter, Teacher, Sister, Aunt, Lover of Disney, Saints, Gamecocks, Random

Tuesday, January 25, 2011

What is wrong with me

Do you know how many times I have asked that question this past month? I ask it all the time when I do something stupid, or silly, or whatever will happen. The other night I asked my self that question what is wrong with me. Paul talks about we sin knowing that we shouldn't and what it leads to. But guess what we do it anyways.
That night I laid in bed probably feelilng as far away from my Savior as I had almost ever felt. I have let stupid things take over my life, school, getting ready for a baby shower, t.v.,the house and so much more. I just let all these things take the place where Jesus used to consume every part of my life. I didn't sleep that night. I laid awake that night thinking about how my life used to be. How life was when Jesus and I were tight. It was like looking upon someone else life and going wow I wish I could be them. It is so weird to be disconnected from who I once was.
This disconnect is seen in everyday life. It is seen with how I deal with Kris, my co-workers, my students, and I am sure in everything else I do. I feel like my plug has been pulled and the last while I have been running on my own power and not the power of the One who made me. That is my biggest sin. Like I know we are not suppose to pin point our sins but that is my HUGE GIAGANTIC BAD MAMMOTH sin. I think that is one of the sins that no one like to admit to. So I am going to take this like AA admitting the things you do wrong out in the open for all to see.
I know my problem, now with God's help I can fix it. I am fixing two problems at once. The not spending time with God problem and letting Him be my all and the fat problem. For Me be a glutton is a sin like me not spending time with God. This problem I have been working on for a while. But all for the wrong reasons. But it is a sin a sin that needs to be out of my life. So will you hold me accountable?